best I can tell abstinence might have improved sleep but I didn't directly state it in my blog. strange that I didn't do so. in the short term of course the opposite seems true. having lots of insomnia lately. despite all I have learned over the years. flu at the moment may be playing a role.

Easy run is maffetone heart rate, wearing heart rate monitor, generally on treadmill. Try to do same with easy pushups. Both in front of TV. Will see how that works. Potentially do same with pulldowns but I expect it won't work or at least I won't have the patience. This is a sort of polarization routine but with just one hard run each week instead of two... So far no insomnia with the little bit of strength training, except for the first two days. For which advil cured it.

I'm thinking I don't really care much for Bach. Didn't know he was really unpopular long ago. Think I feel how others did back then. Wonder how much of his popularity is emperor's new clothes. Think something has definitely gone wrong with classical music, all the pomp, the having to be absolutely quiet, the dress. There must certainly be some pretentiousness going on. But people learn to truly love the emperor's and probably all the pomp too. Some people anyway. So many just end up not really liking classical when they otherwise would.

Sleep is a wonderful thing and I've been doing it great lately. Drinking more water.

Hurt my hip a little. Annoying. Running was feeling so good. Have so much energy. Praying this doesn't turn into this year's nagging injury. Except for that would want to run 50 plus miles per week. Taking it easy for a bit. Maybe get rid of harder runs for a few weeks... Really would like to just knock out 8 miles a day.... And sneak up to 10 for a week or two before half marathon. But that will probably just lead to injury.

Really neglected cello lately. Just too much to do. Have also returned to writing for better or worse.

Reading this Blade of Tyshalle by Stover. It's a bit weak. The hierarchial dystopia combined with a fantasy fiction otherworld keeps it going but not by a lot.

Had been trying to improve at running despite only doing 10 or so miles per week. Was doing all my running on the treadmill at 2% incline. Finally went outside and found out that 2% incline was not enough and that I had gotten slower from 2% plus so few miles. So started trying to run just about everyday (that I have time). All "easy" runs on treadmill while watching TV. Two harder runs each week outside. Want to get back up to near 40 or so. At first was thinking to keep my easy runs very easy, (5mph) but thinking to do them around 6mph for now. In the short term my fast runs won't be as good. But in the long term I should improve more.

Decided I need to drink like 3/4th's a gallon of water a day. Did so and immediately felt better. Had gotten a little lazy with my water drinking before. Had insomnia for the first time in a while and wondering if slight dehydration can lead to insomnia. (Unable to flush out toxins as well.... )

Have 6 weeks till half marathon. So got 4 long runs left. Yesterday did 9 miles at pretty easy 9:15 pace. Want to hit 13 miles 2 weeks before race. Yesterday did last mile in 7:10. Could have done quite a few more miles but trying to keep things gradual... Felt really good afterwards.

Really neglected the cello here recently. And quit writing. When I had insomnia I felt miserable and decided I had to start again. But now the insomnia is gone. Also it's springtime. And expanding the garden.

Read The Fell Knight and The Red Knight by Miles Cameron. Really enjoyed them. Very long. Partially why stopped writing. The Captain AKA Gabriel or The Duke is a magician and fighter. Leads a band of mercenaries. Including Bad Tom and Sauce. Jehan and so on. In Red Knight they are defending some place from an attack of the Wild led by the sorceror Thorn. Dameons and Wyvert(sp) and boglins and irks and trolls and golden bears, etc. In the Fell Knight they are fighting for an empress against a traitorous duke. Lots of characters, constantly jumping around. High level of detail concerning the middle ages. Lots of words I've never heard before. As if Miles figured most people are on a kindle/nook now and can look them up in a second. The Captain hates christianity. He has a place in his head where a person lives. Later on it's Harmodius, the great mage.

Really got to quit reading and start writing though.

At IVF in MD downloaded The Blade of Tyrelle(sp) by Matthew Stover. Book two of Heroes Die. I liked book one. It's about Caine/Hari. The dialogue is a bit cheesy in places but when he goes from futuristic earth over to the middle ages fantasy fiction world, it gets better. But again, I need to stop reading and start writing.

Insomnia from yesterday's exercise. Not sure what exactly though. Possibly from doing the situps as fast as possible. Didn't fall asleep until 5AM. And was supposed to get up at 5:15AM to work until usually 8:15PM. Called off. 4th call off. Can't call off again for next 9 months, or I'm blocked from transferring. Not usually an issue, but I have applied for an unique research position. With my insomnia issues a normal 8 hour a day job would be better for me. And research is a better fit, etc.

How ridiculous that simply switching to doing a set of situps faster would result in such insomnia. In the future I simply can't do any strengthening exercises if I have to work the next day. Or on rare occasions I could then take something to help me sleep.

I laid there, not feeling particularly bad. But just with stuff firing in my brain. Feeling my heartbeat, etc. Like my insides were moving, moving, moving, outside of my control. Sleep was impossible. Finally called off and just read a book until I finally felt sleepy at 5AM. Slept from 5 till 10. Now I sit here feeling like I've done something wrong. Like I've been bad. (sigh). What the hell though? Who can't fall asleep until 5AM because they did a sit of setups at about 2pm?

If only my work days weren't 15 hours long, taking care of critically sick people.

On the plus side, my manuscript finally got accepted. To be published almost two years from now. Making it a literature review with nothing from the most recent 3 years, which is stupid.

Last week ran four days with 5 lb dumbells. This was first time running more than twice a week along with first time in more than a year I used dumbells.

Previously it gave me insomnia. And finally on the 4th day, it did so again.

And insomnia combined with running 14 hours straight, for three days in a row, taking care of very sick people, is truly hell.

I've now had a few days of decent sleep and I've all kinds of upper body muscle from the dumbells. But that's just absolutely not going to work. I don't know why upper body exercise so often gives me insomnia but I think I'm going to slowly get a pretty wimpy upper body as I just can't stand that insomnia. Not in the job I have.

Today ran 2/2's on treadmills at 9.2/3.2mph. Just started using the treadmill as can't stand the weather. And now actually I'm curious about my speed throughout my interval sessions. Only did 5 miles today. 9.2 mph would be about a 20min 5k.

There is a feeling of being utterly alone, disconnected from all, that makes sleep very difficult. Alternatively there is instead a feeling of being connected somehow. I mean literally that my brain is somehow telepathically or morphogenically connected that gives reassurance. Perhaps it's just my nonconscious. Or perhaps it is an actual connection. (Twin studies of brain wave activity suggest it might be...) Whichever it may be, things start happening in my brain that are not being caused by my conscious. As they happen I relax and sleep can come.

And to lay here and think there is a connection helps it start happening. (Although far less important than proper physical activity and correct eating.)

Insomnia tonight. Been awhile. I guess a bit of light weightlifting must have been at least primarily responsible. I called off work. First day missing work in 8 months, so don't feel too bad. I used to have insomnia so much. For decades actually. It was awful. I don't know how I survived. ...oh yes, now I remember. I invented an evil god that was trying to kill me, whom I would live on just to spite. Oi vey. It was really bad. Although went to that extreme for more than just the insomnia.

But now I know how to not have insomnia. Don't lift weights! Seems ridiculous. But so it is.... So must give thanks for knowing what I have to do, to basically never have insomnia. Think of that. And not feel so bad about tonight.

Gave up having one to two alcoholic drinks per day. Was trying to do that primarily because studies have definitively shown it's better for one's health.

So I tried. My mind felt dulled but I soldiered on. Finally gave up because I was getting some insomnia. I'd much rather die 20 years younger then have insomnia. Really the mind dulling was getting bad enough on it's own. I figured I'd develop a tolerance and manage to think through the fog, but it didn't seem to be happening.