Went back to the soul cairn in Skyrim. This comes the closest to that place I have seen in my mind for so many years. I have the music playing in the background. Replaying Skyrim for it. Almost didn't find it.

My friend, Bekah, is going to be admitted to the hospital for some kin of mania. It happened 8 years ago before I knew her. I was hoping if it ever looked like it might happen again, I could help and stop it. But I have hardly seen her since she started feeling bad. Just her husband, who is very nice but I think not terribly bright. And with her parents tonight driving back from Georgia, where S just moved. S who was my close friend for so many years and now hasn't spoken to me in over 3 years. No particular reason ever given. I was very very worried about her going down there. But then Bekah said she was better. And hasn't seemed to want any advice.

I don't think this is how it should work. But I think this is what they want. I suspect they are wrong.

My tennis is its best ever. Except that I can't take the heat. 92 today and couldn't make it 3 sets of doubles lol. Could play 5 sets of singles (against most people) if it was 20 degrees cooler. Gasquet forehand. Federer backhand. Laver serve. Trying to get back into endurance running. Hoping it will help me stand the heat. People 20 years older can handle it better. Yes, I had open chest heart surgery. But surely I can make it back. Decided to run despite the agony looming over me. (Kidney stone that was pushed back up into my kidney where it has sat for 4 years so far.)

Driving home from tennis started cramping. First the muscle on the underside of my jaw. Then I sneezed and my abdominals. At home cramps in my back. Feet. And I was hydrated. I guess I could have done more though. The cramping as I drive down the highway is a bit dangerous. Totally devoid of energy the rest of the day. But not ready to give up tennis in the summer. Only in my 40's.

Dune and partial Dune Messiah by Herbert. Really enjoyed. Always loved the Lynch movie. Book follows very closely. I can understand what a let down book 2 was, but that's exactly as expected. It's simply realistic which is what fantasy usually isn't. But Herbert had a realism to him.

Tried Thomas Covenant by Donaldson again. Gave up when he committed rape. Somehow I forgot that from before. Perhaps was seriously skimming previously. Before gave up because he was such a whiny bastard.

Warbreaker by Sanderson. I liked it and .... what was it even about again...???? Oh yes. Gods. Breaths. Enjoyed but find it not even worth describing now. A few people come back after death. They can then do one miracle which will kill them. In the meantime they will die if they don't take someone's breath each week. Other people can take breaths and have special powers they can use without dying. Yeah just too complicated like most magic systems by Sanderson. Needs to stay more mysterious.

30% into Sapiens by Yuval Harari. Going on about how we were better off as hunter gatherers. Meh. Otherwise enjoyable.

Have been reading David Foster Wallace. I used to turn my nose up at writers that commit suicide. But some of these people are hooked on medications and when they get out of whack they do unfortunate things. But being hooked on the medications doesn't mean they are without wisdom. Anyway liked that he's intelligent and talks about tennis. So I read some of his essays. Don't know that I will read Infinite Jest. Ultimately I didn't discover anything special. Just tennis musings combined with a bit of a brain which was nice.