It's incredibly important to have some friends. I may be losing S after all these years. I so much as suggest heel striking (when her achilles is injuried from non-heeling striking in vibrams) and she loses her shit saying I'm always pushing crap on her. No matter what I say she accuses me of something. I've barely mentioned the concept of veganism to her in 5 years, I'm married to a omnivore for 13, yet, supposedly I'm constantly trying to convert her. Etc.

Wanted to talk with her about these issues... and she couldn't be bothered. I got angry. Thought it basically meant she was done with me and it was a shitty way to go about being done with someone. She claims otherwise but now, "needs some time away from me." I wonder if she is done with me but just doesn't want to feel guilty about it. So it needs to be my fault, etc.

Must remember this is a lady in her early 30's, who I guess isn't gay, who's never had a serious boyfriend. One way or another she has some issues.

I love that she keeps it real (extremely honest). I crave this so badly. It's why I tried to befriend people long distance who refused to actually speak to me. I need realness. BUT, keeping it real leads to fights, usually.

I hope she'll get past this and we'll be friends all our lives. But I'm having my doubts. Should I ignore all my past experiences or try to learn from them? "Learning" from them means being a suspicious bastard I guess. Lately trying to unlearn what life has told me. Trying to remember S is very "quirky".