The Once and Future King by TH White.
Not serious enough for me. But has a lot of detail. Third person. Merlin and "Wart", whom I guess is to become King Arthur. 100 pages in. Feels very random. Now having an adventure with Robin Hood. Merlin turns "the Wart" into animals a lot. If it were to suddenly get more serious it could be good. Here and there it is a little serious. But I can hardly be bothered to read this.

Entered first race, a 5k in Morg, did some "omega male training" 3 days out, ran 21:40. A big PR. And third place. Although last year it would have been 16th. Less than 100 people ran. Was fun. S did well also.

I did 2 miles in 14:29 a month ago? Really? I'm not that fast now. Did a mile in 7:30 and I think two in 15:00 minutes would have been kind of hard, though I stopped before that far. Guess more frequent easier runs might have been useful. Going back to that. All the sickness may have been a coincidence. Or the weightlifting, more likely.

61. Clearly some sort of chase but mixed in with a discovery. You discover something and then you're chasing it. And it leads you into greater discovery. Say an underground world, through an old abandoned subway system or such. What is the discovery though and what comes before it such that it flows smoothly and makes sense? How can this by itself be a short story? I don't think it can...

57. Again that's some inventor sort of person... You're at their fantastic place.... Have to relisten...

Thinking of writing some short stories inspired by my songs. 57. rez noise-lots of crazy off the wall inventions... Wife yellling at me to hurry up. There's my 5 seconds of writing for today...

10/2's for 16 miles in 2:27:40 Last couple hurt. That first mile in 7:50 felt pretty easy.

The Crystal Cave by Mary Stewart First person. Relatively realistic characters. Pretty richly detailed. An account of Merlin based somewhat closely on what is actually known from historical records, although admittedly not as accurate as possible. Accurate enough that it isn't as good of a story as it might otherwise be. But one of the better books I've read in a while. Curious what Mary Stewart can do if she's just entirely making it up. Now back to book three of Gormenghast. Lately with all the fantasy fiction I've read, I've been increasingly dissappointed and I find myself remembering this book though as having stuck with me much better. Definitely one of the best I read. Dislike that it's in third person. Couldn't bring myself to read the third book earlier because I know the author dies right in the beginning of the fourth as his hands literally lose the ability to write and his scrawl slowly becomes entirely illegible. So far in book three nothing has really happened. (Finds city and meets Muzzle....?) It's really just Peake's magnificent voice. That makes nothing much really happening still enjoyable to read as I lay on a swing on the porch in this nice weather with a glass of lambrusco.

10/2's for 16 miles in 2:29.

Saw interesting concert tonight. Again, three cello's beat an orchestra.

Got a research position. Has positives and negatives. I think it's a much less ridiculous position for me. But I liked my old job. Worry I'm a bit too far gone for the more typical interactions one usually has in a workplace. Shall see.

Conversations with God by Neale Donald Walsh
This book made me understand first and foremost that one should never push a book onto others. I posted something critical of society as a whole on facebook. I wasn't locked up for it. Probably just put on ignore by 80% of people. But strangely someone replied I might like this book.

So being just naturally curious I borrowed it, as it wasn't available on kindle. And now for the last two months I've procrastinated and felt bad that A. I haven't finished it yet. and B. as I think it's crap what am I going to tell the person I borrowed it from???

Offering a book to someone is a horrible imposition. Even if it's Manufacturing Consent by Herman and Chomsky, I guess.

I gave up on this book halfway in where with different wording "god" basically says he wants everyone to have an extreme optimism bias and that if bad things happen to you, it's because you actually wanted them to.

But what should I tell the person from work who loaned it to me?

I shouldn't bother saying anything negative about society in any public setting, that's for sure.

Fledgling by Octavia Butler
First person. Hero has an "ace" but not hardly up her sleeve. 300 pages but felt like a short story. They find the killers kind of easily and they're convicted by a rather quick trial. Liked the beginning but it developed a pedestrian feel as it went along. Started feeling embarrassed about reading it, etc. Oh well. Bad guys highly and stupidly 2D but is that so different from real life? Perhaps it could have been better if longer. Felt rushed towards a happy ending. Wanted Parable of the Sower but it wasn't on kindle so just grabbed what they happened to have at the independent bookstore when I really should have used amazon.

Boo hoo, woe is ME!

reddit.com is a pretty good site. Somewhat makes me feel better about humankind. Found an extremely intersting article there plus many useful comments about an 80% optimism bias. Reposted it at FB and no one commented or liked. Because I don't know any interesting people at all. But there are some out there. Scattered very few and far between, almost impossible to find online it seems.

Got sick three times in last month or so. Once after getting a tetanus, diptheria, .., pertussis shot. Second time from the worst hangover I think I've ever had. And finally from either a stomach flu or food poisoning. But this all coincides with changes in my exercise program. Going back to running twice a week. Want to get up to 3 hours each time because that makes work much more tolerable. Mostly slow continuous running, but with some hill repeats and finishing off with a brisk mile or two. Ed Whitlock broke 3 hours for the marathon at 73 years old by running for 3 hours continuous almost each day. I've found repeatedly that two days a week works almost as well as 5, 6 or 7. (Although maybe not really with aerobic activity....) Anyway, it's first and foremost about feeling good. And I've felt pretty damm bad recently with running much more frequent plus some light lifting.

Went to a site called goodreads and read a bunch of reviews for a few books. Mary Stewart and R Scott Bakker... Was depressed by the stupidity of most of the people. In order to find happiness I have to get past that. Just forgetting the reality of what's out there is what has worked best so far. I wonder if there might be some other way. That the ravens, fish, squirrels and cats in my life aren't so smart doesn't bother me. Perhaps I could learn treat other people the same way instead of expecting them to be my equal.

Conversely, many people are hypersensitive to such an arrogant attitude in me. But short of becoming a stupider person they'll still say the same.

Perhaps it's part of the very cycle of the rise and fall of civilizations, that social norms are developed and those who disagree with them are slowly but surely quite simply removed from the gene pool until everyone agrees, and then shortly thereafter the society is destroyed from it's erroneous(sp) ways. It does certainly appear that the idea of disagreeing with the social norms of today has become a thing that's just not done anymore. Maybe 100 years ago. Then you go take your commune out in the wilderness which would eventually fail anyway. Now, not really. Seriously I don't really see it going on anywhere to any meaningful degree.

Maybe someone rants about how they hate Bush or rightwing thinking. And someone else goes on against the corporate coverage of war. Meanwhile, someone else with a hippy bent goes on about marijuana being illegal. A very very few people may even go on about the absurdity of lawn mowing, the great American pastime. But most focus on single issues and even these are few and far between. Or I just know all the wrong people. That could be it.

Still I'd do well to learn to love mowing the lawn. This year I find myself minding it less than in the past. But I think that's because I'm in better endurance shape then I've maybe ever been. Still the bamboo should be here in a couple of weeks.

Recommendations from the great Robin Hobb:
The Heir of the Night by Helen Lowe
I didn't very far. I agree with this review:
http://www.strangehorizons.com/reviews/2012/04/the_heir_of_nig-comments.shtml#comments

Only Forward by Michael Marshall Smith and something in the middle of a huge series by Steven Burst
They both remind me of Jim Butcher's Dresden Files, which isn't a completely awful thing. I like first person but it's a rather crude first person. A simplistic person.

The Crystal Cave by Mary Stewart
This one I'm 56 pages into and liking quite well so far.

Good mood lately. Why I couldn't say. Running more often, mostly continuous runs? Or is it related to a second sperm analysis that came back far better than previous and furthermore that as such I'm drinking alcohol again? Or spring?

A few pond dreams even. Even a slight writing breakthrough. (First person).

OTOH dreading that I might still get offered that job. Although hearing nothing for a month is a good sign. I should have learned my lesson by now. Ideally I should be doing something more with my mind, but thinking ideally is exactly what's caused me so much unhappiness throughout my life.

Sunday night did 4 miles in 32:30. Today, wednesday, did 6 mile repeats in 7:07, 6:49, 7:18, 7:03, 7:25, 7:35. Slower than I managed a while back. Have gained 5 to 10 pounds with lifting more. Also have neglected faster running a little, I guess. Going to do mile repeats twice a week. Really ought to do more than 6 I think. I guess I'll still attempt to add in "easy runs", which are about 9:30 to 10 minute miles. But geez, those get boring quick.