Starting two weeks ago started running outdoors instead of on the treadmill. I picked the worst time of year. Ground is covered in snow/ice. Despite using a 3% incline the conversion still isn't very good. Maybe mostly because of the snow..?? Last night ran at a track for first time in many, many years. Did lap intervals. Interested in trying to train somewhat like Roger Bannister. Not bothering with the tedious slow stuff. I'm doing 8 quarters currently. Last night averaged about 1:55. Which is damm slow. Knee continues to be in this place where I can't quite tell if it's getting better or not. I can look down at my legs and see a clear muscle imbalance. I bought a perfect exercise bike a couple days ago. Hopefully that will help. Thinking maybe to combine that with power cleans. It seems though 13 hour days on my feet combined with the running is just too much for my knees.

Right now going down to running maybe just once every 4 days or so. In part because of the right knee issue. Also in high school ran a 6 minute mile just from playing basketball and riding an exercise bike, so I can improve plenty from where I'm at with little actual running, perhaps.

Too busy lately. Barely been playing my cello. Taking care of both parents. They're sleeping in the tree room. Mom's back is very bad, most likely will require surgery. At the point where she just about can't walk anymore at all. Dad is getting better at the moment but still has the catheter in. Writing music is a luxury I no longer have time for. I want to work really hard on Romberg's sonata in c major. Had a bad lesson yesterday. When I'm too tired I just suck at cello playing. Probably need to ease up the running. Again a bit much of that and my cello playing goes to hell.

The Gate to Women's Country by Sheri Tepper

A fantasy fiction alternate society where the vast majority of men are considered to be violent, monsterous creatures that shouldn't be allowed to reproduce and that shouldn't be allowed to be a part of civilized society. This book suggests that roughly 5% of men are decent and that we perhaps should use eugenics to rid ourselves of the violence, power seeking activities which permeate our world.

Beautifully done. Slightly reminded me of To Kill A Mockingbird. Advocation of eugenics is not an easy one to manage but it's done very well here. I strongly agreed with the points Tepper made throughout. This here is a template to remember.

Similar to Bakker the main character has no ace up his sleeve, instead it's other side characters. Also the injustice isn't glaringly blunt.

Plot develops quite slowly, I almost didn't get into it. The flashes to the greek play I didn't like at the time but in hindsight seemed brilliant. Yet if attempting to appeal to a large audience are probably a mistake.

Beautiful analogies. That so many men perhaps could be good but are coerced, pressured into being "manly"/"not gay" and thus becoming harmful ugly creatures. In regular society thus permeates. In this society they thus choose to stay in Warrior country. To be one of the few "sissies" who comes back to Women's Country takes an exceptional man. But it's stark and easier to see whereas in our real world we can't see that the same thing is happening on a hourly basis, in our social norms.

Loved the bigamist Mormon society at the end also.

This story is not as capitivating as Hobb, Martin, or even Bakker. But the ideas could be life changing to a person who reads this at the right time. As such I'd say it's the best fantasy fiction I've ever read. A much more important author than Bakker who edges into tediousness but whom I still read because of the side characters hidden aces.

Book one of the Prince of Nothing by R. Scott Bakker
I find it difficult to break it down. Either because it's on a higher level or because breaking it down gets in the way of the enjoyment and it's highly enjoyable. Not quite as enjoyable as Hobb's Farseer Trilogy but nothing else is as good.

There is some injustice but not put out there very bluntly. Not dwelled upon. Injustice is simply a fact of life from Bakker's POV.

There is an unknown related to magic. Definitely not overexplained. Done just right.

The main "hero" has a hidden ace that instead of being related to magic concerns his having defeated his unconscious. Which is pretty cerebral as is the book in general for fantasy fiction. Considering though what an important idea conquering the unconscious has been to me the last few years, it's almost notable how little it matters with regards to enjoying/not enjoying this book.

This is the most cerebral fantasy fiction I've ever read. And the story has held me pretty well. I suppose not quite as well as George Martin or Robin Hobb. Occasionally he stops the action too much in order to describe a setting. Occasionally he goes off to characters that don't appear to be of any importance or much interest. He has a bad habit of having characters asks themselves a lot of questions which I don't care for. Strays a bit toward the boring stuff of reality.

The political intrigue reminds me of Dune and gets somewhat tiresome and the setting is generic middle ages. Still excellent though. Probably will read much more, maybe everything by Bakker, whom has so little popularity he's going to have to go get another job he says.

They realized that this world was hopeless. That the end was nigh. And in the last instances of humankind they retreated elsewhere for they were The Elses. Out into the forest they went rejecting mere surival and focusing on the else. Things like playing the cello for endless hours day after day for decades. Totally useless stuff. Living off fruit and nuts and low and behold living much longer as a side effect. But rarely ever breeding. More androgynous, more often gay, away from survival and reproduction. Off into silly stuff. Away from reality. But capable of doing well at mere survival as they were more intelligent than average, intelligent enough to have turned away in the first place. Above average fighters. Much faster and smarter but much smaller and thinner and would almost always simply turn and run away. Generally they hated man but didn't dwell upon him. Few let hatred burn them up.

They were few of course. Far, far fewer than man. How else could they be the else? And of course they rarely bred, and never take on wars of conquest. Instead they just forever retreat. On the other hand, they lived longer and were generally smart enough to stay the hell away from men, generally smart enough to find places to hide. So then, there existed small pockets of heaven, if you could ever find them. But they'd rather you didn't. Even the best men just infect their heaven with ugliness. As the warring races of men have the most offensive and sick norms ingrained so deeply into everything they do.

Dad taken back to hospital by ambulance on Friday for looked like a stroke but apparently was a partial seizure caused by low blood sugar. Low blood sugar caused by kidneys not clearing diabetic medicine properly. Very stressful day. Last two weeks also very stressful. He expects me to be his nurse 24/7. My sister (also a nurse) doesn't help. I've been in the hopsital more than 200 hours last two weeks. On top of this I keep getting slammed at work with horrible patient loads. To stay sane one has to keep some emotional distance from their patients, with being a family member in the hospital so much these last two weeks I've lost that and have been just panicking at work now.

I previously felt that even if I won the lottery I wanted to keep working (reducing my hours of course) but now, I dread work. Finally slammed again Saturday and it was finally just too much and I finally made a mistake. Nothing life threatened but I just feel sick, feel so bad want to quit. Called off Sunday basically for a 'mental health day' not that we're allowed any such thing. Just said I was "sick".

Apparently there's something in Little Debbie oatmeal cookies that triggers those sinus headaches for me. Had a headache starting around midnight for the last 12 hours. Hadn't had one in quite a while. Took aspirin. Now took tylenol. Think I'll be OK for my cello lesson today. It was last week but I postponed because I never had a chance to practice since the previous. Rescheduled then my dad got rushed to the hospital yet again so I still have barely played.

Mother also can barely walk because of back issue. They're both staying in the spare bedroom. The "treeroom". And I'm taking care of both of them. It's nice to have them here. Before just being across town we'd sometimes go weeks without seeing each other. Too bad it takes this to see them more often.

Curse of the Mistwraith by Janny Wurts

Nice prose but there is not much sense of injustice. There has been a fog for 500 years but 200 pages in and we've neither been shown nor told why exactly this is quite such a bad thing. Maybe it's supposed to be mysterious? But if so, that's not the thing to wrap in mystery IMO.

There are two heros. They have aces, but not up their sleeves, more so right out in the open with too many people well aware.

Beautiful prose but except for some injustice to the one hero which is overcome very quickly, this just doesn't have the essential elements a book needs to keep the pages turning. I've too many other books waiting and have given up at 200 pages.